Managing Your Emotions is Crucial in Growth
You are sitting at home at 11:59pm. You text your bae.
“Hey boo, WYD”
8 minutes passed and you receive no response. So you decide to kick it up a notch. You take off those pants and bust open a sensual yet dirty crotch shot. You upload and push the send button proudly because your man can’t deny that midnight snack. (Ayyeee)
“She’s ready for you…”
10 minutes pass and still no response. At this point you become frustrated. “This is it”, you think. “He is out here with some little THOT trying to play me like I’m some dumb Allegheny broad.” But your like "Nah I’m not going to go there just yet. I’mm a call his a**.”
So you call him. Phone rings, and rings. Then goes to his voicemail.
You send him text.
“Oh so you just ignoring me now?”
5 minutes pass and still no response. So what do you do next? You go into investigation mode. You go to his Facebook/Instagram/Twitter page to see the last time he was active. You see his FB messenger has the green active icon showing that he is available. His last post was at 11:45 pm. You knowthat he stays up to 1 am all the time. Based on all of your evidence, you now have all that you need to go ham. So then you call him, but this time it’s straight to voicemail. “No this dude didn’t!” You thought. You wait until his once cute, but now wack a** voicemail finish playing.
“So I guess you out there playing with those gutter rats. That’s cool. It’s whatever, I’m too cute for this.”
You then take your tirade to texting.
“Why? I really loved you and you gonna play me like this? When you had nothing I gave you money to pay your bills. I let you borrow my car all these times and you are going to treat me like this!??! You know what enjoy your night and you stay blessed.”
At this point you go to quoting tons of he-ain’t-ish-and-I’m-a-good-woman songs. You are all on social media taking seductive pics and hitting up those dudes for conversation when previously you rebuffed them based on your relationship. You have a couple glasses of wine (or shots of Vodka, dealer’s choice) and fall asleep.
The next day (after a crazy hangover) you wake up to 10 text messages and a few calls from him. He was sleep the whole time.
Is this you? I mean be honest girl, is this you? Maybe not this scenario, but are you making big time decisions off of small bits of information? If so, you need to cut it. (ya’ll can’t see it, but I’m doing a little dance over here.)
Too often we make big decisions off of our current emotions. We jump to conclusions and it can cost us some big things. Relationships, friendships, jobs. I remember my mother told me about a girl who was her ace, but they stopped talking suddenly. Later she found out that during the conversation she had with my mother, the lady was offended because my mom laughed at something that maybe she shouldn’t have laughed at. Instead of reaching out and saying, “Hey, it hurt my feelings when…” she instead just stop talking to her. That’s it. Then I’m sure she’s probably telling other women, I just don’t like what she said. What the heck is that? When that happens, we get in our emotions and let the emotions cloud our judgement.
Women are known to be emotional, this is true. We raise children who are just pure emotions. However, just because we are more emotional, it doesn’t mean we are devoid of logic. We have it and when used, we are dangerous. When we allow our logic to play a greater role in our life we make less mistakes and are less likely to be taken advantage of.
For instance we get blinded by looks and a man’s nice word. He tells us in every conversation about how we should be together and how beautiful we are, buys us a few dinners, and then we are in a relationship with him and eventually a baby. Then we realized, he never really talks about anything. He sucks at being asounding board. He doesn’t support your dreams. You were so swept up in your emotions that you didn’t give a critical ear and eye to this guy. If you did, you would have seen that his constant usage of flattery was just an attempt to hide the fact that he’s not a good conversationalist.(you love conversation) You loved that he just paid for everything without asking, but you forgot to ask the deep questions.
We let our emotions get ahead of us and it drives us into a full swamp of regret. When we don't manage our emotions we can push away some amazing people and potential suitors because they don't want to deal with all the stress and headaches brought on by irrational thoughts.
I love my emotions and can sense disturbances in the force with others, however, managing them has done me way more good than harm. When you allow your emotions to take over we make some dumb mistakes for the sake of our feelings. For instance you and the father of your children broke up and you just can’t stand him. You are salty about all the time you put into him, not yielding the long term results you were looking for, so now you are single. Next he finds someone new before you were completely over him. Now you come up with ridiculous rules to make the relationship harder with your children.
Some of us are insecure and instead of just dusting it off we allow it to get the best of us. Then we project that insecurity on to other people. Maybe your girl is getting more play than you and instead of just doing you, you tell her that you are tired and ready to go. Or, a woman is interacting with your man, and instead of waiting and letting him handle the situation you roll up ready to throw fisticuffs.(She’s his cousin by the way)
Is it hard to manage emotions? Yes and no. Depends on how deep that emotion runs. There are times when I’m juggling so many other people's emotions in life that I find myself lashing out at certain people who didn’t deserve my wrath. Maybe you are going through a lot in your life like the lady in the news who lost everything in the storm and went off on the reporter. That 1 straw can break the camel’s back. Other times it is truly just a refusal or lack of self control. It’s less work to just allow yourself to feel what you feel and just say “I’m sorry but that’s just me.” We should always want to grow and improve. Managing your emotions is a key to growth. We can’t always have things our way and sometimes we won't agree with another’s decision. What we can do is figure out the next best step for us and go down that path. Emotions and all.
When have you let your emotions get the best of you?