Why he just won’t leave you alone
Sometimes I like to get a little smutty and watch love and hip hop. I mean I deal with real life all the time and sometimes I need a little messiness to remind me that it could be worse. On the other hand sometimes there are story lines that aren’t messy, but very relateable. One of the more believable and less petty story lines was Tammy and Waka’s separation situation.
Waka was on tour cheating with some scallywags and his wife put him out. (yass Tammy!) No, she hadn’t divorced him but she was making her point known. This isn’t the first time Waka had cheated on a dime like Tammy but I’m assuming it was really bad this time. In efforts to try and make things right with Tammy because he knew he was wrong (Like most people who never thought they were wrong prior), he shows up to Tammy’s home with his bags. Tammy was open to talks about getting back together, but just that; Talks. Tammy opened the door and sees Waka with his bags, like he was about to do something. She tells him to leave his bags at the door (go Tammy!) and then tells him he can come in for a little bit. She goes to her very lavish kitchen (I’m straight hating!) and says to him my favorite line and what women want to ask men who keep coming back after they have screwed up;
“Why are you heerre?? With your Bagggs???
I guarantee you that many of us have had that man who keeps playing with our emotions and coming back with their “bags” (testicles, tee hee) trying to make it right. Shoot this isn’t his first or second time. This man is a habitual come backer. It seems like his goal is to stop you from being great by going down memory lane and saying to let things go. At this point you are 100% sure he doesn’t love you. I mean if he did, would he mess up this many times? I mean, it’s a lot. We are adults and even a child can learn a lesson, but you are telling me this grown a** man can’t? I call bullish Oprah.
So if he doesn’t truly love you and he doesn’t want to marry you, why is he wasting your time?
I have a few reasons, let’s talk gal.
- Because you keep allowing it-His relationship with ol girl didn’t work. He’s hurting. D*ck's a little bummed out. He needs someone who knows him and who he is comfortable with, and baby you are on that list. What’s really bad is that you keep hoping for more so you keep accepting it. He’s a creature of habit and as long as you keep accepting his habits, he’s going to keep coming back. It’s like feeding a bear. Once they have identified a food source, they keep coming back until there is an obstruction preventing it from eating there again. Don’t feed the bear.
- He’s comfortable- We touched on that a little bit but let me dive in deeper. Some people don’t like having to get to know someone new all over again. You have to learn what they like and they have to learn what you like. You have to learn someone’s body if you want to please them versus just a smash partner. They have grown accustomed to the way you handled things and when other people do it, it’s so foreign. For example, you may iron his socks after they are washed. He thought it was asinine but was like “okay, cool.” The new chick however just throws them in a drawer never to be paired again. (He hates that by the way) Then, there is you, my sweet friend. You know what he likes. You know how to turn him on, what’s his favorite food, and how he likes to be treated in your everyday interactions. It’s just that he doesn’t see you for long term romance due to some ungodly reason. They know you may not be the one but they know that you are decent enough for them to past the time until wifey gets here. They will cuddle with you, watch T.V., do everything one would do in a relationship except marry you.
- You are easy- He doesn’t have to put in much work to get back with you. Ya’ll aren’t in the first stages of dating or getting to know each other. So he doesn’t have to bring out the representative or spend tons of money on dating. He knows how to put it down and he knows, you know how he puts it down. (you little nasty..I ain’t mad). He knows that dudes out here aren’t make you climb the walls like he does, so all he has to do is buy you some grippos, a moon mist fay-go, and turn on Netflix. (I mean you do pay for it, so he’s gonna obviously use that too).
I’m sure there are many other reasons why he keeps coming back with his bags, can you think of any? Let’s sound off!