Posts in Dating
Being Dumped Made Me Re-Examine Who I Was

I let slide a lot of things red flagish behavior that I'm ashamed I did.

I turned a blind eye to him getting more comfortable with his baby's mom. I turned a blind eye to the texts that insinuated that more was going on than simple co-parenting.

I even turned a blind eye to many after hour calls to this woman, well after I was asleep.

And even after I confronted him and he showed no remorse, I still was willing to stay with him.

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What Makes A Woman Wife Material?

Lesson #2 "A single woman shouldn't travel too much or do too many big lifetime achievements by herself."

Because what else would a man have left to bring to the table if she can do it alone? If she has a house, a big paying job, or traveled too much when she finally encounters a man, what else could they do together?

She has to let a "man be a man." She has already experienced tons of life's significant milestones. Why would she need a man? How could she respect him if she could do for herself what he could do? So, even though I could afford to do so, I pushed aside purchasing my first home. I didn't travel to far and exciting places because I wanted to wait until I found a man. I didn't want to scare him off with my ambition. (How brainwashed was I?)

So I made sure I didn't do too much because I didn't want a man to be intimidated by my thirst for life. Although I suppressed my desires to do it big, I still was living single.

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3 Life Lessons I Learned While Dating

Some of us (including myself) are guilty of going on pity dates or dates that we don't want to go on. Or, the offer of free food has been presented to us, so now we have to go.

Then when you go on these dates, you are unimpressed, uninterested, and uninspired. You knew that you should have stayed home and watched Netflix with chilled wine. But noooooo, you had to go out and do something with your life, and now you are stuck listening to him talk about who is stronger; Super Saiyan 4 Goku or Super Saiyan 4 Gohan.

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He Doesn't Want To Be With You, He's Just A Good Guy

You are this vivacious, beautiful, good azz woman who is great to be around and a blast to be with. Your family says you are a great person. Your friends think you are terrific. The guys you don't want are all in enamored with you. You are this great catch so no man should be able to resist your charm.

Unfortunately, you can be the sweetest peach in Georgia, and there is still someone who may not like peaches. (Thanks Shanna!)

There is something about you that makes him not want to be with you in an exclusive relationship. But just because he doesn't want to be committed to you, doesn't mean that he doesn't see the value in the friendship with you.

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Why Are You Still Single?

Being single is great, but having a relationship is great too! Some of you ladies out here genuinely want a relationship and aren't all about the She-Ra-Sis-Boom-Bah single life lovers' chants. And ladies, that is okay. It's okay also to sit back and reflect on what you can do to make yourself a more attractive partner. Sometimes there are things we need to work on to be better mates, daters, or women period. We aren't all born already knowing how to be a good partner in a relationship. Sometimes you have to invest time into yourself to see what is stopping you from being great.

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4 Fun Summer Dating Tips!

Don’t meet someone you just met in a private place- Many of you are into online dating, which I think is cool! Unfortunately, it’s hard to read someone until you meet them in person. Sometimes they may offer to come to your place or invite you to theirs, but just say no! Meet them (and anyone new for that matter) in a public location until you finish vetting them and are comfortable. Do not let anyone rush you to do what you aren’t ready to do. If they say they can find someone else to do whatever, throw them the deuces and get right back on it!

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4 Ways To Protect Your Heart While Being In A Situationship

You're Not The Only One - Hurts doesn’t it? The fact that you put that thang down so hard and so bad that you thought, "Man he ain’t going nowhere and he’s only going to want this." Negative, Nancy. You are not his only thing he is smashing, he’s got Bettys on deck. He may not tell you this, but trust and believe me, there are some other ladies that he is entertaining. Especially if he is not trying to lock you down or is not coming to you often to get it( a lot of men claim to have high sex drives, so I’m just going off of what they claim). You can’t blame him, he’s a single man, and that’s a perk of being a single man,

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Confessions Of A Single Gal: Part 1

Now our girl will tell another chick in her situation that she should move on. Or make sure she keeps her heart separated, but it’s hard for her to take her own advice. Just like many of us. Why is it so hard to take our own advice? We know this is good stuff and we know we are giving some A1 advice but why do we not take it? Do we feel like we are above our own advice? That we can beat it? Or maybe we think if we keep giving others this advice that somehow our own issue will become better.

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Dating 101: Top 3 "Good Guys" To Watch Out For

He contacts you throughout the day and mysteriously is never available in the evening. And when he is, he is trying to come over to your home to see you. He doesn't want to go out in public on dates because he doesn't have the money to spend on expensive dates,(yeah right) and if you offer to pay he'll come up with another reason why he can't meet you but insist to come over. (He think he slick)

When you finally do go out, it's to a place that's in a obscure area.  Why is he doing this? Because he's really not single. He may be kinda single but not all the way single. What's kinda single? It can fall into some of the following categories

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Leslie Jones Echos The Sentiments of Many Single Women

Yes, I like to exude positivity and think on the up and up but I would be a fool to say myself or to other women that I have never felt the way that she has felt.  Especially during the holidays when you see all your friends are getting married and having kids.  She shared something deep and notable that has hit many a woman on a drunken Saturday night when they look up to see their weekend bottle of Malbec is gone and the last episode of “Frankie and Grace” has played.

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How to Tell if He is Worth Your Time?

Yet, when I look at the women complaining about the men they've dated and how much time was wasted on him, I can’t help but think “how are you surprised?” At times, us women are so desperate for a solid relationship that we tend to let words carry us away and forget all about the actions that should accompany those words. You have to know your worth, meaning understand the value you bring to the table and expect that from him as well. I get that everyone is different and situations may vary, but there are some pretty similar thoughts on how to tell if this guy who is interacting with you is worth your time.

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ABC News Shades the F*ck out of Black Women

What really set me off was their tone deaf article title, “For many black women, Meghan Markle’s engagement offers ‘hope’"

Hope? Really? I’m not sure which offended I should be.  Should I interpret this as black women are in such dating despair that this one person’s engagement is our relationship drought savior? Or that black men are such disappointments that black women are praying for a white miracle to save them?

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Should You Wait 90 Days Before Sex?

Some feel that this isn’t an adequate way to really tell if he’s here for you. Some guys will play the role for 90 days and still leave.  Here’s my personal belief:  Guys don’t like it because they have to wait for something they want right now.  They have to put a little more effort to get it, when honestly they were just hoping for it within the first week or two. (some cocky guys say the first night. But you know, F**k them.)  I do agree with men on some of their viewpoints.  A man could play the role, take your goodies and run. However, in my years of research, hearing other stories, and understanding human emotions, is waiting a period of time really that bad?

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Managing Your Emotions is Crucial in Growth

Too often we make big decisions off of our current emotions.  We jump to conclusions and it can cost us some big things. Relationships, friendships, jobs.  I remember my mother told me about a girl who was her ace, but they stopped talking suddenly.  Later she found out that during the conversation she had with my mother, the lady was offended because my mom laughed at something that maybe she shouldn’t have laughed at.  Instead of reaching out and saying, “Hey, it hurt my feelings when…” she instead just stop talking to her.  That’s it.

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Lessons from the Mindy Project: Are You Really in Love with Him or the Idea of Marriage?

ome of you know some “good” guys right now. These are good guys who you just don’t have a connection with.  These are decent guys who will love you to death but you just aren’t that into them. Yet, because you think it’s better to have a good man that loves you more than you love him. With this thought process, you aren’t loving him the way that you would love him if he was your best friend or you had a stronger connection.  This to me is what settling is.  You aren’t excited about this man and though he will make a great partner, you are just basically using him for the marriage. You are using him so you won’t miss your chance for babies or your chance to be a wife.    My dear, no one wants to be used.

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4 Reasons Why Putting Your Business On Social Media Is Not The Thing To Do

 People Never Forget-  Keke and her husband may wake up tomorrow and decide to work it all out. Now it’s too late.  She’ll want to move forward and get on with her life, but everyone who saw it will still bring it up more often than she will.  It’ll be 10 years later and people will still say “so you and your man still getting a divorce?” Messy a** people will say this at the most inconvenient times, like at your mother’s funeral. You know, rude schit like that.

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